I LOVE being a Mom

Today when it was time to put Abby down for a nap I pulled out a CD that one of my good friends made for me when I was pregnant. It has a bunch of lullaby type songs on it and it put Abby right to sleep. But while I was listening to it and looking at her in my arms I started getting all teary and became overwhelmed with the spirit. I couldn't believe she was finally here. I feel like I have been waiting for her my whole life. Since I was a little girl myself I wanted to be a Mommy and for a couple of years I wondered if it would even be possible (for those of you that don't know it took Alex and I about 2 years to get pregnant and it took a lot of outside help to make it happen). When we found out we were pregnant I was so emotional. When that test was finally a positive I couldn't believe my eyes. I cried and cried I was so happy. Now that she is here I have a whole new perspective on life.

When I was younger I remember my Dad telling me that I would never understand how much him and my Mom loved me until I was a Mother myself. I now have such a greater understanding of that love and it feels so incredible knowing that my parents feel the same way about me as I do Abby. I would do anything so that she didn't have to feel any pain or sadness. I want nothing more than for her to be with Alex and I forever, even after this life. The thought that she could one day make decisions that would prevent this breaks my heart. I know Alex and I will do our best to bring her up right but ultimately the decision is up to her.

This got me thinking about our Father in Heaven and his love for us. Having a baby helps me to understand his love for us in a new way as well. I would imagine his love is even greater than the love I have for my daughter, even though now that feels impossible. I know he would do anything if it meant we would all return to him. What sadness he must feel when one of us makes a bad decision, it must kill him inside knowing that we may make a decision that will keep us from returning to him. Knowing this makes me want to try to be better. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have of eternal families. It would be so sad to think that death was the end, that we couldn't be with our families anymore.

These are just some of the things I was thinking about..it's hard for me to put them into words but hopefully I got my point across. I love my family!